Tag Archives: life

The Apartment Hunt (And Other Reflections On Life)

I used to love apartment hunting. When I first moved to Madison, few things gave me as much joy as plotting my inevitable release from the one bedroom apartment I shared with two other people. I loved touring apartments. I loved spending hours on different websites comparing layouts and designs. It felt so grown up.

But I have to admit, as I contemplate my 17th move in 8 years, I am thoroughly sick of apartment hunting. 

I think it is mostly moving around Madison. For the, like, half a second when I thought I was moving to Texas, the new adventure stirred me with excitement and I probably would have jumped in with enthusiasm. But as I’m fairly committed to Wisconsin for at least the next year, no new adventure exists. I know the housing options in Madison. I’ve studied them carefully. And I know what it will cost to exit student housing into the “real world.” Eek. 

I tried passing off the apartment hunt on Bethany, but she demonstrates extreme indifference towards where we live, so there went that plan. (Actually, I take that back. She is quite opinionated if I suggest a place she considers cheap, sketchy, or somehow uninteresting. But don’t expect her to locate a place on her own. It won’t happen. Sorry. That sounds passive aggressive. She truly is a good roommate. I like living with my sister. But did I mention I’m sick of apartment hunting?) 

So, I’m back to apartment hunting. If I want to torture myself, I sometimes look at townhouses for sale instead and imagine having a place that is mine. A place where I can paint the walls or tear up the carpet or replace the shelving. A place that means permanence and roots. 

It is a weird dichotomy. On the one hand, I crave the adventure that comes with somewhere new. On the other, I’m getting a little tired of new. I’ve done new a lot. I’ve done Tennessee, England, Idaho, Colorado, and Thailand. And Wisconsin. A lot of places in Wisconsin. 

It comes down to impatience, mostly. I’m e-mailing with an apartment complex now. I think the person I am talking to checks their e-mail once a day. At least, that’s the response rate. And I’m impatient. I want to just apply and move forward already. But I also have questions. 

So goes life. I want to know what I am doing post-August. I want to live in a place I won’t move from in a month, or half a year, or a year. I want a job that says permanence. Because I’m impatient and sometimes forget I’m only 26. 

The process of becoming is a challenging one. Whether it means impatience in housing, impatience in education, impatience in social distancing, I just want to move forward. But the becoming is important. Through the angst, I develop the person I am. The person I will become. I learn the lesson I’m supposed to learn. But gosh darn it, sometimes I wish I’d just learn it already. 

I named this blog “fernweh,” meaning homesickness for the abroad. Sometimes, though, I feel the opposite. I feel homesickness for the familiar. I wish I’d just settle, plant roots, and be content. But always in that feeling, I feel the itch. The itch for new. The itch for other. 

And so I apartment hunt. Because maybe tomorrow someone, somewhere, will list something that somehow combines my desire for ‘new’ with my desire for ‘home.’ 

And, wow, does that feel like an angsty way to end this post. But I’m feeling angsty today! I promise to calm down once I’ve settled on a new apartment. 


Social Distancing (And Wal Mart Adventures)

How’s social distancing going? Today I broke my plastic hair-pin-lace loom by using too much force. Didn’t even know that was possible. I now have a quarter-finished scarf. 

Bethany decided I needed to get out of the apartment. (Actually, she decided we were out of chocolate and she wanted to go grocery shopping but she still doesn’t drive.) 

 So we went to Wal Mart.

On the bright side, the shelves are better stocked than they were. We saw toilet paper and hand soap. Still a lot of empty shelf space, though. 

It was surprisingly crowded. Wal Mart had signs everywhere encouraging  people to stand 6 feet apart and periodically made announcements over the speaker to tell people to go  home if sick and even if healthy, stay 6 feet apart. Which, lets face it, is nearly impossible in such crowded aisles. 

But it does lead to two extreme reactions in shoppers. The first type look horrified if you venture down the same aisle as them (even if on the other side of the aisle) and give you furtive glares every few seconds. The second type look amused at their daring in coming close to you. As soon as they break the 6 feet, they grin and look mischievous. 

I don’t know that either reaction is an improvement. 


Promotion!

I have not heard back from the interview I mentioned a few days ago, but I did get a promotion at work! I am officially the Foundation’s Director of Development. I am pretty excited for the opportunity. I have fancy business cards and everything

In other news, today kicked off spring break! Soooo ready to for the next few days of rest and catch-up. 


A Very Important Interview

Tomorrow I have a Very Important Interview. If you happen to think of it around 2pm central tomorrow, send up a prayer for me. 

My emotions have been a bit all over the place. Initially I felt nothing but panic. Something along the lines of

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And then I felt excitement! What a cool opportunity!

And then I asked my career adviser what some sample questions might look like and she sent me an entire web page. Now I feel intimated and 3 steps behind already. (It seems I should have skipped class and had the interview IMMEDIATELY.) 

So, we shall see. I will let you know how it goes. 

(I apologize for keeping this intentionally vague.)


Bleary Eyes

Between writing a brief, leading discussion groups, and working on an assignment worth 30% of my grade and due tomorrow, I am a little brain dead. Possibly past brain dead, actually.

I drove to pick up Bethany from work. It was raining. It dimly occurred to me that everything seemed really fuzzy. Like, more fuzzy than usual. I blamed exhaustion. 

Turns out, it was a fog. There is really horrible visibility right now. I question whether I should have been driving.

Is it spring break yet?!


How Many Cups of Coffee Am I At?

Me: “Yeah, the new guy also works as a waitress.” 

Boss: “You mean waiter?” 

Me: “That’s it! I couldn’t think of the male version of a waitress.”

Boss: “I’m the one who has been at work since 5:30. What’s your excuse?”

With the two of us on the job, I have serious concerns about how this brief is going to turn out. Good thing we hired an intern. #ohwait #I’malsotheintern.


Jogging After The Judge

In the TV show of my life, today’s episode would begin like this:

Scene: Amy is sprinting down State Street in high heels. She’s wearing a pencil skirt and a statement necklace that makes a loud clacking noise with every step she takes. People turn and stare. In her hand she holds two phones. She answers one:

“Hello, Judge? This is not Kirsten. Yeah, I’m coming.”

Cue narrator: How did I get here, chasing a 7th Circuit judge across Madison? Well….

*rewinding noise* 

*caption–10 Minutes Earlier* 

Amy: “Hey, Kirsten. Ready for the speaker?” 

Kirsten: “Yeah, I’m really excited. But I’m so nervous people won’t show up. What if we brought in a 7th Circuit Judge and only had 6 attendees?!” 

Amy: “If it comes to that, I will round people up. Shouldn’t the judge be here by now?”

Kirsten: “I expect her any second.”

*They wait.* 

*Ten minutes pass.* 

Kirsten’s cell-phone rings: “Hello, Judge? Oh, no. Oh, no. Um, okay. Uh-huh. Well, I don’t know. Amy, you park in parking garages. Can you tell the judge where to park?” 

Amy: *is directionally challenged*

Amy: *sends judge to incorrect parking garage* 

Amy: *decides best thing to do is meet judge at incorrect parking garage 5 blocks away*

Amy: *starts running*

Judge: *stumbles upon correct parking garage*

Amy: *arrives out of breath and not knowing what the judge looks like*

Amy: *finds judge and makes awkward small talk for a few blocks. Unnecessarily clarifies a few more times that she is not, in fact, Kirsten* 

Amy: *confuses judge by inviting everyone in the atrium to the event that formally started 10 minutes ago. No one moves.*

Amy: *delivers judge to a room of roughly 100, applauding people* 

Amy: *slides into a corner, basking in the second-hand glory of the moment. Everything goes silent.*

Amy’s stomach: *gives a loud, very noticeable growl*

Sigh.

*cue canned, audience laughter*