Tag Archives: life

A is good…but B is good too

I interrupt my travel adventures with a post I wrote 8 years ago because it occurred to me today…graduation season is coming up! So to all the graduates out there getting tired of being asked what you plan to do next, I hope these words resound for you the way they continue to resound for me.

Out of the Air

What if I were to be all deep and spiritual and say to you …God gives us choices. Your response might be something like, DUH. Of course God gives us choices! That is part of what it means to be human, why we are not robots, free will and all that stuff.

But if you are anything like me, your idea of those “choices” involves a good choice…and a bad choice. Take Path A and all this great stuff will happen. Take Path B and you will completely screw yourself and your future. Worst of all, you have strayed from God’s perfect plan for your life, so now you are damaged goods! Really, no pressure.

Recently I have been struggling with a decision that, while not completely life changing, was pretty obviously a crossroads. Panic ensue! I was fairly certain one of those paths must be God’s will, and the…

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2018 Reading Goal (Update)

We’re hitting my favorite time of the blogging season! The part of the year where Larry comes out and sings a silly song.

No wait, that’s not it.

It is the part of the year where I review the best and worst books of 2018!! And with 255 books complete, you better believe I have a lot to say. I did not have a list of ‘Mind Blowing Books’ last year, but no worries, you’ll get a good one this year. 

However, this is actually an update to say…you’re going to have to wait. I have a major paper to finish and 4 scholarship application essays to edit in 3 days. Then I’m packing up my apartment and getting ready to move. My goal is to slowly write the majority of my Best and Worst book posts over the next few days and then schedule them while I’m on a flight to Thailand. That way, you won’t miss a day of me! 

Between the books and travel, stay tuned, things are going to get good! (And also, thank you all for tolerating these very brief posts over Christmas.) 


Shopping Trip Addendum

Today my Dad and I hit over 10 stores finishing Christmas shopping. At least 6 of them involved me looking for camisoles (for myself) and leaving with nothing. But Dad was kind enough to stand there on his phone like a teenage girl while I looked! It was a fun afternoon and I think we’re just about ready for Christmas! 

 

 

 


Wrong Side (of the Apartment)

I have been blessed over the last year and an half by an abundance of kind people who give me rides places, especially people who give me rides to and from bible study. 

But I have a confession. And this is true both with my current apartment and my last one. If someone drops me off at the wrong side of the apartment complex, I won’t say anything. It feels like such a small thing. What does it matter to me if I have to walk a few extra minutes? 

But it is also such a silly thing. It would make more sense for me to have them drop me off at the correct door. Yet to do that, I would need to tell them they’ve spent the last few weeks dropping me off at the wrong place. That’s embarrassing.

It starts off so innocently. They drop me off for the first time and I gesture to the building. They pull up to the wrong door. I know my key will work anyway so I smile and wave and go inside. I could say something but it feels so extra to say, ‘no, not this door on the building. That one.’ 

So I say nothing and the next time they drop me off at the same spot. And again. And again. And by that point so much time has passed…well…to say something would be so awkward. And it is such a slight inconvenience. 

But still, a wholly unnecessary inconvenience. And I don’t know what to do about it.


Fluent in Confused Daughter

Maybe it came from raising 3 daughters, maybe earlier from having 3 sisters, but my Dad is great at translating the language of Confused Daughter. Take last night:

Me: “Hey Dad! So I was driving and then I heard a beeping noise and I looked down and a weird light on my dashboard was on and it was by my temperature gauge and I looked and the engine temperature was all the way in red! So I pulled over.”

Translation: My engine is overheating. 

Dad: “Where are you?”

Me: “Well, I left home and turned at Dustin’s – y’know, by the farm – and then was on that road and passed the place with the boats and now I’m on a stretch of isolated road. It looks kind of serial killerish.” 

Translation: I have no idea. But I am not lost. 

Dad: “Did you notice anything else odd  while you were driving?”

Me: “No, it drove fine.” 

Dad: “Is your heater on?”

Me: “It isn’t at the moment but OHMYGOSH I DID TURN IT ON RIGHT BEFORE THE LIGHT CAME ON AND THE BEEPING STARTED. DID THAT CAUSE THE PROBLEM?” 

Translation: DID WE JUST DISCOVER THE PROBLEM?

Dad: “Probably not.”

Me: “Lots of cars on this road for how late it is…someone just pulled up behind me…go awayyyy…are they going to pass me? I hope they don’t get out and try to help. They’re going… No….? Ah, pulling up alongside…I’m good! Yup…go on along. Totally fine. On the phone. Already being helped. Okay. So what should I do now?”

Translation: Not talking to you at the moment, Dad, but stay on the phone anyway in case this person isn’t so nice.

Dad: “How about you turn around and come home?”

Me: “I can do that but I’m going to go straight first because this road has too many blind curves for me to comfortably turn around on in the dark. This might take a little bit. I see some driveways…maybe if I can find a road up ahead to turn around…And then I won’t go too fast in case the engine overheats again.”

Translation: It may take me a few extra minutes to get home but I’m coming. 

And you know what? Through it all, my Dad just patiently talked me through what to look for and when to pull over. Because he’s awesome like that. 


Why I Don’t Watch Horror Movies

Grandma: may want to skip this one!

There I was. Stranded on a dark, rainy road in the middle of nowhere. My van decided to overheat and like the experienced driver of old vehicles I am, I instantly pulled over and called my Dad.

As the phone rang, I looked out my window and realized how much my surroundings resembled a horror movie. Wet. Cold. Dark. Late. Broken vehicle. I allowed my imagination to run wild for a moment…

And came up with nothing. Because I don’t watch horror movies.

But I know about serial killers. So I locked my van and contemplated that for about half a second.

Then the voice of reason in my head pointed out I live in the Midwest and at most someone would pull over and ask if I need help. Sure enough, within 5 minutes someone pulled over to check on me!

Thankfully, my car was fine for the drive back to my mechanic…aka, Dad. Hopefully I make it to Madison tonight!


Staying Safe as a Single Woman

I’ve seen a lot of posts lately contrasting the numerous steps women take to keep themselves safe to the “non-steps” men take. So for example, women always taking pepper spray, avoiding dark alleyways, refusing to leave their drinks unattended. Men, the follow up thought goes, do nothing. And honestly, some of it hits home. I mean, tonight I bucked up for an Uber to the event I was attending because I don’t feel comfortable on the bus after dark. I also chose not to take my van because I fear parking garages late at night. I talked on the phone to a friend for the brief walk from where I got dropped off to inside my apartment. 

So yes, the fear is real and a legitimate thing. But I still struggle with these posts. It takes a moral high ground that doesn’t really…exist. Not all women spend every moment thinking about how to not get attacked. And certainly not all men behave as if safety means nothing. Not all men go about attacking women!

Maybe awareness is something we need more of and if so, great. Guess what? I, a single woman, am often mindful of my safety and take perhaps extreme steps to keep myself safe. But that’s life. That doesn’t make me a victim. That doesn’t mean I need to demand some redress of wrongs. It means we live in a broken world and sometimes navigating that world means taking steps to be safe. 

So be safe. Share tips for being safe. But don’t make this a Her against Him thing. That accomplishes nothing. Make this a partnership to talk about how we watch out for one another. That will accomplish far more than resentment against men for not worrying about parking garages at night.