Imagine a Hallmark movie sent in Milwaukee, Wisconsin. A restaurant owner walks in on her fiance cheating on her. Then a curmudgeonly, British food critic writes a scathing review of her restaurant. She’s newly single and in despair. He’s British and cranky. They meet…she doesn’t know his identity as destroyer of her restaurant…they fall in love over Wisconsin food…
Oh wait, that’s the plot of The Coincidence of Coconut Cake by Amy E. Reichert.
Maybe if I did not know Milwaukee I would have taken the book more seriously. As is, I could not keep a straight face, even while hearing about familiar landmarks. Cheese curds are amazing…but not the food of love. Maybe the food of constipation. Brewer games are super fun! But probably not The Best Thing Ever for someone who does not like sports. Etc. Etc.
The utter drama of the story and the string of lies the hero tells the heroine (combined with the fact that the curmudgeonly food critic who does nothing but sit around his house all day has a six pack…) quickly turned me off.
The book tries, it really does, but I just could not take it seriously. Still, quite memorable.
I just got off the strangest call trying to set up wifi at my new apartment.
First, the woman who answered the phone had a thick, Southern accent. However, as the call went on, it slowly disappeared. By the end of the call, she sounded like she was calling from Milwaukee.
Second, this statement from her: “According to the system there are deals in your area, CONGRATULATIONS!!!”
Third, this dialogue:
Her: Yes, ma’am.
(In retrospect she was responding to me but I sure felt like I was in trouble for sassing her.)
Fourth, she kept trying to sell me on a landline. I kept saying I didn’t need one. I only need the Internet service for a few months, and also I am not 105. She promptly got super huffy with me! She then told me a bunch of horror facts about people calling 911 from their cellphones and subsequently being unable to give their address. (A problem you apparently don’t have with a landline.)
It was a ride. But hopefully I will have internet soon!
“Amy was basically raised on a farm! Weren’t you?” my co-worker turns to me with a beaming smile.
My own smile freezes as I try and think of how my very suburban life could ever be construed as being “raised on a farm.”
“Ahhh, not really. I live in a subdivision,” I finally say.
She nods as though I have just confirmed her point. “Well, I was raised in the inner city of Milwaukee, so we basically come from opposite ends of a spectrum.”
I suppose if you really don’t live anywhere near grass, a subdivision could seem like a farm. Maybe?
Today I made it all the way to Madison and back without a GPS! I know I’ve been making this drive almost every month for nearly 2 years, but you have to understand, directions aren’t my strong suit. Or my weak suit. Or really, in the suit at all.
That said, my triumph today is tinged with embarrassment. I got on the highway towards Madison and drove for a good 5 minutes before it dawned on me that I was driving in the opposite direction of where I wanted to go. I was even looking for a specific exit and had been studying all the signs towards Milwaukee with great interest without it once dawning on me that I was not even pointed in the right direction.
It wasn’t that I was lost, per se. In fact, I’m rarely lost. I am, however, frequently turned around. Today was one of those days.
One of the perks of living at home is that I have two sisters who wear the same size clothes and shoes as me. When you combine my Mom’s wardrobe into the mix, there is a lot to choose from.
I rushed home today from work covered in sweat and dressed in a baggy t-shirt and shorts. I had 15 minutes before I was running out the door to celebrate my friend’s birthday at a restaurant in downtown Milwaukee. I had no clue what to wear.
Thankfully, my sister Bethany took me in hand and within a few minutes had me in her maxi dress with her belt and necklace to accessorize. I opted for a pair of flats but they were so uncomfortable I gave up after 30 seconds. My second option (a pair of basic black heels) got vetoed by my Mom and other sister in favor of some “kabam” sandals. Within 13 minutes, I was dressed and ready for the town.
There are challenges to sharing a room with sisters…especially when we are all naturally messy people. However, it certainly comes with its perks, too! I trust my Mom and sisters to be straight with me when it comes to my outfits, so when all 3 of them are giving me the thumbs up, I leave the house feeling quite confident!
Dad may be out of town, but that didn’t stop us kids from going to his company picinc! It was good to be joined by my brother and sister in law. Three cheers for family, free food, and free zoo!