13 Going on 30…Part 2

Today I tried to purchase beer for my chili. The signs above the cash register read: “We card under 30.”

I am 30. But, I thought, I will do the noble thing and pull out my I.D. anyway.

The cashier took it without comment and tried to scan. It did not scan. She frowned and summoned her boss over. The boss attempts to scan it. It still doesn’t scan.

Trying to make light of the situation, I say: “I promise I’m 30!”

Both cashiers glare at me suspiciously and proceed to examine my I.D. minutely. Turns out, the problem was that they had their machine on the wrong setting.

But seriously. If I was going to have a fake I.D., would I really claim 30?

A Long Work Week

Me: “So, I think I figured out why all the attorneys are exhausted.”

My boss: “Yeah?”

Me: “We all were at the conference last week and traveled back on Sunday, which was like a 6 hour bus ride. And then we showed up to work Monday. So we’ve been working at best 12 days straight. And some (me) have been working 10+ hour days during those days.”

My boss: “What if I scheduled an attorney retreat for a Friday evening after work.”

Me: “I think you missed the point.”

Busy Season Reminders

Next year I am going to hit this point in September and think: “Was I still in busy season then?”

And—much like my reminder to myself in July when we had 0 cases in the queue when we left—I leave this as a reminder that yes, busy season doesn’t end in September. It just gets crazier. But it will end eventually.

Probably?

In the meantime, if you’re looking for me, I’ll probably be in the office racking up comp time and checking my blog from years past to see if I was this overwhelmed last year.

Yesterday

My assistant: “Yesterday felt like a full week but it was just one day.”

Me: “I am pretty sure I went through the emotions of a week yesterday.”

My boss: “It definitely took a week off my life.”

Wednesday: Let’s top that.

Happy Anniversary, Parents!

31 years young. Happy Anniversary, Mom and Dad!

Wrong Jellybeans

It sounds funny to say, but as soon as I saw that JellyBelly had changed their packaging, I knew it was going to be a rough Monday.

It isn’t that I am particularly set on things Always Being the Same Way. But I work with lawyers. And they rather do like things The Same Way.

Even, and especially, their jellybeans!

Every month or so, the director of legal gets a new container of jellybeans (to ‘freshen the pot’) and sucker us into swinging by his office for small talk and sweets.

But this morning, he unwrapped the jellybeans…and threw everything off! Someone tell the candy manufacturers that they can’t go changing up their flavors and packaging. We have Opinions!

And on a Monday no less!

Work Bus

Our charter bus came with a loud GPS voice that only says one thing: “Increase distance when following.”

Meaning, bus driver, you’re too close to the car in front of you.

After several hours on the road hearing only this statement on semi-regular basis, from the back of the bus someone shouts: “Tell it to mind its own business already!”

I conclude there is no good way to travel.

Call Time

Me: 6 hours of sleep last night and 16,203 steps in high heels. At least I get to sleep tomorrow! I am taking the bus. No early airport runs! We should take a bus every year.

Charter Bus: We’re out the door at 7. Also, if you want breakfast, that’s on you.

Sob.

“Snacks”

Today I had back to back meetings from 10:45 am to 5 pm.

Good meetings. But notably lacking space for lunch.

My 2 pm meeting learned of this. Jan immediately sent her husband to bring me cookies.

I think I have discovered the secret to their happy marriage. He returned with cupcakes, crackers, olives, salami, cheese, veggie straws, and I am pretty sure the entire remnant of gas station snacks from their 11 hour plus road-trip from Louisiana.

Jan then sent him back for the homemade chocolate chip cookies he somehow overlooked.

Tell me you are a mom without telling me you are a mom?

“Chaperoning”

“Sorry, can’t come out. I am chaperoning!”

So you would have heard tonight if you asked me to do…anything. Sorry, can’t go to the hoedown. Can’t go out for dinner. Can’t get in the bus. I have to ‘chaperone’ the teen track tonight.

Because…I didn’t want to do anything but return to my room and crash tonight. Except I did tell the teen track leaders I would chaperone. So I showed up.

And there were more adults than teens. (There are like 5 teens?)

But this place is a maze. And I don’t know how to get from the bonfire to…anywhere else. So I think I am stuck. “Chaperoning.”